Joël Bélanger speaks about his schizophrenia

An interview conducted as part of the writing of SUJET.

Christophe: — Joël, you do sound poetry, right?

Joël: — Oh, me, I’m good, I’m good at it, I improvise!

C: — You do sound poetry…

J: — Exactly but I’d better not lose my temper because if I do, I’m going to feel dizzy then, I’ll be shaking and scared. I must be calm but I can’t say I’m doing okay because I’m not, I’m not and so even if I’m doing okay, I always say I’m not, so people are used to it.

C: — That’s a clever strategy!

J: — Clever strategy, indeed! And now I’m being filmed and listed to, I have to move, to take action. I don’t want to seem unsettled, excited, nervous, restless, ugh. I want to appear like a very quiet guy who knows what he’s saying and doing…

C: — And last time Joël, you treated me a little bit...

J: — I did, yeah, let me see…

C: — How do you… What are your healing techniques?

J: — This is magnetic healing, I’m a medium, a voyeur, a psychic, a mesmerizer and magician, I have a 6th and a 7th sense, a gift, supernatural powers, I can cure anyone, that’s the truth, that’s the secret of truth and reality, and to top it off, it’s free! A prayer while touching the hand, the body, or remote treatment even, it all comes down to the same thing.

Laurent: — He’s got healing abilities…

J: — I can cure you!

C: — How long…

J: — I set you free, I erase it from you and I deliver you from evil, evil, evil, I expel it from you! Wait, I’m going to say the prayer, hold on ladies and gentlemen, I’m saying the prayer. I need to think… Nervous, ugh? I’ve been into your soul, your heart, your body, your penis, I’m not a faggot but… I’ve been into it… into your life. Okay, here we are, it’s over, now you’re going to be, you’re going to know happiness, you’re going to live on love alone, just like me, and you’re going to know happiness, I’ve cured you from evil, I’ve erased it from you, I've delivered and freed you from evil. I can do it to the two other men here as well if they want me to. I want my freedom! I want my freedom, it’s nobody’s business but mine, I want to be free and happy, Christophe.

C: — Last time, Joël…

J: — Let me see now…

C: — Are you okay?

J: — So, you’ve come down, you’ve come down…

C: — Yeah but I’m still a little…

J: — I’ve erased it from you, I’ve delivered and freed you from evil, Evil, do you know what Evil is?

C: But evil…

J: Good vs. Evil, I hate evil, I expel it from you and then it’s good, the yes, maybe, it has to be, that’s absolutely certain. That’s all I have to say.

C: — And Joël, how long have you been curing people like this?

J: — I’m frank, straight-forward, honest and generous, I’m straight-forward! I can’t feel it, it can be jerky, it has its starts and fits sometimes but still, I…I think I use my force and my magnetic power the way I should, I can do remote treatment, yeah even that, all the time, all the time, I can do that all the time, endlessly, for ever and ever, it won’t exhaust me! It’s in me, it’s in my soul, my heart, my body and my penis. I have to pray, that’s my job, I pray and it works, I’m the messiah, I’m the one, I’m God’s son, Jesus Christ and Bruce Lee at the same time, reincarnation since the dawn of time and I have waves and supernatural powers and it’s free, and it’s innate.

C: — And why Bruce Lee, then?

J: — Bruce Lee because we trained together, even if people don’t believe me, I don’t care.

C: — You practised martial arts?

J: — I’m a red belt, 10th dan in Kung-fu, Chinese Boxing and Vovinam-Viet Vo Dao. But I don’t like fighting, I don’t like messing around, I just hate it, I turned to martial arts to feel better about my own self, I’m peaceful, respectful and free towards martial arts, and I’m Jesus Christ, I’m resurrected.

C: — That’s interesting, you mean, your parents were born in Nice?

J: — Yeah, my poor dad, he was born in l’Alinde, Dordogne but my mum who’s tired, exhausted, who’s weary, worn-out, tired, exhausted and feverish, fragile and sensitive…

C: — Where was she born?

J: — I’d better not lose my temper because I’m feeling dizzy, here it goes again, I’m scared of myself…

C: — Where was she born, your mum, where was she born?

J: — She was born in Nice, so was my brother Denis. He’s 16 months older than me, I’m 52, he’s 53 ½.
C: — He’s from Nice ?

J: — And so am I, cut off from Marseille. I yield to my disease, my disability... the disability is very strong, it’s powerful. It keeps you going, and then it holds you and that’s bad, that’s evil and I expel it all because normally on planet Curdeau, over there on the other side of the sun, people live on love alone, no disease, no disability, it doesn’t exist over there, everybody feels good, experiences wellness and complete happiness, happy and free, free, I’m saying it again, free! No imprisonment, freedom! Yeah, that’s it, I know what I’m saying, what I’m doing, we all have the right to be happy in our lives.

C: — And today Joël, where do you stand as far as happiness is concerned?

J: — I felt unable to be filmed and heard at first but I’m not scared anymore, I’m surfacing, it’s time, I’m a Mediterranean, I’m only fully awake from 3pm on, it’s okay, I have a nap during the day, I have a nap. And then, I wake up and then at night I do la Dolce Vita, at night I do la Dolce Vita, I party the night away…

C: — You stay up all night?

J: — With girls, champagne and all! Three grand a night, for 40 years, thank you ladies and gentlemen! One billon 400 thousand on my bank accounts, thank you ladies and gentlemen!

C: — Yes, that’s because you bet on horses, right?

J: — Because I win, I win the fight, I’ve won my fight and I can be filmed now, look at me and listen to me, listen to me and look at me, I’m here now. I mean, I’m filmed, I film myself, I have a hold on my film, on myself. I can’t look straight at the camera because I have my own view on life, I have my own view on life, and I know what I’m seeing and hearing, I believe what I see and hear, I believe you, I trust you all, you’re the present we’re alive, we are alive! We are alive! With me, people will never know what death is, period and I have an accent from Marseille even though I’m from Nice and I’m of Italian origin, thank you ladies and gentlemen! That’s it, I’ve said enough for the moment, STOP. In my subconscious and my imagination, I know what I’m saying, what I’m doing, I improvise, all the time, all the time, all the time… I’m free and happy, I can say and do whatever I want, I’m free, period. I suffer for the whole planet, I suffer for the whole human kind, thank you, it’s free, that’s the truth, that’s the truth, the human kind is sick and disabled. We can’t make sense of it all, we’re innocent, everybody’s innocent, it’s not your fault, ladies and gentlemen, it’s not your fault, it’s planet Curdeau’s fault, my own planet on the other side of the sun. We have to get through the sun and land on that galaxy over there… to pull through. And the world will never end because the Earth is going to move, it will go through the sun and land on my planet, Curdeau, and then we’ll all be happy and free and feel good about ourselves and we’ll live on love alone in oases, in the countryside, wherever, in the mountains, at the seaside, in oases and all, everywhere, all the time, just that, no more wars, just love…

L: — How many wives would you like to have in your life?

J: — Just one as long as she loves me, that’s all I’m asking for, no money, love alone, in oases, deserts, seas, mountains, in… everywhere. And let me tell you something, that’s the secret of truth, of reality, that’s it, it all comes down to this. I don’t regret what I do, what I say. What I do, what I say, that’s the secret of truth, of reality, that’s it, I’m filmed so I have to talk, I have to let you know what’s going on on my planet. You wanted Hollande, now you have him. For one Euro-cent, we wreck our livers here! Thank you! It’s not right! Is it, Mr. Sébastien Bach?

S: — I don’t give a damn about politicians, I just care about football!

J: — Ah, football, politics, too, politics, music, football, rugby, go on, go on, go on, politics, go on politics, go on, politics, go on! It’s not so good because I’m shaking, I’ve got spasms, starts and fits, I’m scared, I’m suffering, I’m in pain, I’m tortured and I want to talk because I’m scared, I can’t remain silent and still, I’ve got to talk and move, sorry ladies and gentlemen but I can’t help it, it fucking scares me, I’m scared now…Oh my, I’m too free and happy.

C: — Too free and happy?

J: — Too free and happy, too much drugs or not enough, just enough, I’m scared. I’ve been scared in my life, I nearly died more than once, illness and death, I’m sad and exhausted, I can’t stop talking, I can’t help it, I’m going to talk to myself now because I do understand myself, I’m sad and exhausted, ladies and gentlemen, I’m sad and exhausted, I’m not happy, I can’t take it anymore, I’m at the end of my tether, it’s been going on for 52 years, I’d like to change, for the better, for the best, for the better, I wish things got better for everybody, I really wish there were love between all of us not war nor sickness, I’d like it to work out alright, I can’t help it, I must say it, even alone in front of somebody, it’s unfair, I’m on justice’s side, it’s unfair, naturally, it’s unfair, supernaturally, it may be fair but I’m not sure, it’s not so obvious, I must disclose the secret of truth, of reality, I’m the one who holds the love of the human source.

C: — Could you try to list all the meds you’re on?

J: — I know them all, Avlocardyl, Parkidam, Loxapac, Dipiperon, Mag2, that’s it, that’s 5 or 6...

C: — And do you think it’s a good thing?

J: — They do me good alright. They keep me tranquil, they’re tranquillizers, but I want stimulants, I’m overtranquillized, my brain’s numb, I’m sleeping, I’m tired, I’m going to have to awaken at some point, to wake up, no? It’s almost time to eat, ladies and gentlemen, to take our meds, chemistry above all, beware, there’s no secret of truth, of reality in that, chemistry’s the strongest, the most powerful thing, it keeps your disease and disability alive, it keeps your brain alive, it keeps you alive longer, my legs are restless, they ache, my back aches, my whole body aches, I can’t take it anymore. I’m worked up, I’m full of rage, fury and hate because I know my mum is going to pass away and go on the other side of the sun, in Curdeau, before us, and I’m sad and exhausted from knowing this, that my mum is going to pass away soon and go on the other side of the sun in Curdeau, before we do, and I’m sad and exhausted from knowing this, that my mum is going to pass away, I wonder if it’s going to make me violent, spiteful and dangerous when she passes away, with rage, fury and hate for life, life, I eat it up, la Dolce Vita, la Dolce Vita, I make the most of my life, a man, a woman, everything, I’m filmed, I'm speaking, it all scares me!

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